


Only Fools

by southsidesister



Category: Suits (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Business Trip, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Romance, Suits, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:35:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22598662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/southsidesister/pseuds/southsidesister
Summary: Set in season 8, Harvey and Donna are on a business trip together. A moment shared at a piano in the hotel bar leaves them both bewildered. While Harvey is ready to face his feelings, Donna is ready to move on when someone else appears on the scene. Is Harvey too late? - Written for the Darvey Valentine's Day Project 2020.
Relationships: Donna Paulsen/Harvey Specter
Kudos: 18





	Only Fools

**Author's Note:**

> _A/N: Written for Valentine's Day Project on Twitter. (DarveyValentine). Huge thanks to Cassie (Follow-ur-Shadow) for her cheerleading capabilities, otherwise this fic never would have gotten finished._
> 
> _Prompt by Patricia (darveycanon)._ Set in season 8, Harvey brings Donna along for a business trip. There's a piano in the hotel lounge. Donna tells him she knows how to play (childhood story), so he asks her to play for him. She does and they almost kiss. They have the rest of the trip to face their feelings.
> 
> _Angsty as always. I hope you enjoy it! :)_

**Only Fools**

·❤·

°•.•°

"I love you, Marcus. Listen, if you need anything, let me know, okay." With a sigh, Harvey ends the call and stares at his phone, now heavy in his hands. The news he received ricochets inside of him before it lands, leaving him with a broken heart. His little brother is getting a divorce and has abandoned hope of a reconciliation. Marcus' marriage is definitely over. The only positive side is Katie agreeing to shared custody. The hell Harvey went through a week ago wasn't in vain, and yet it feels like he lost. It's another marriage down the drain and a brand-new reminder that relationships are finite. No matter how much he craves to have a significant other to share this mess of a life with, nothing lasts forever, and he shoves the desire to not be alone into a darkened corner of his soul.

He isn't exactly great at relationships. Sure, he's tried, but when it comes to opening up or even being honest about the hard truths, he's always failed miserably. No wonder none of his relationships lasted. Scottie. Paula. They both crashed and burned because he felt the need to hide parts of his life. Yet, the first person he had called when the desire arose to talk about how rough things had been in Boston was Donna. And as he'd listened to her voice on the other end of the line, something had shifted deep within him, like a door opening to a space that had been locked down for far too long. An unlit, no-go zone that was finally ready to accept daylight. The days passed and the new sensation swirling around his heart whenever he thought about her had intensified, so much so, that ignoring his feelings was becoming a struggle. Still, he kept a lid on it, afraid that once those floodgates opened, he was in serious trouble.

He never could hide anything from her. She wouldn't let him and now he finds he doesn't want to. However, only a few months ago, Donna made it clear she, too, doesn't want to be with him. And maybe it's for the best. Maybe he is just meant to be alone. Some people are better off that way.

"What's going on?"

The soft voice coming from his right draws him out of his moment of self-pity and it reminds him that for the next few days, he'll have plenty to keep his mind occupied. As he looks into her hazel eyes, he is met with genuine concern and a sad smile teases his lips. "Marcus and Katie are going through with the divorce."

"Oh, Harvey, I'm so sorry."

He is, too. More than he can say. "Maybe I could have–" He can't even finish the thought. He knows there is nothing he could have done, but it still feels like he's partly to blame somehow. Just like his parent's marriage ending was his fault, too.

"Harvey, don't. It's their decision. You did everything you could."

He ignores her unwavering faith in his abilities. "A lot of good that did," he mumbles into the decanter occupying his restless hands when four fingers curl around his arm and he stares at the freckles covering her manicured hand. The touch is comforting, but it's not enough to break the spell he seems to be under and he clenches his jaw, fighting an overload of emotions he doesn't know how to process. So, he gestures to the bartender for another refill.

"Last round," the young man says, pouring Harvey a shot of Macallan 18. "For the lady?"

Donna shakes her head and lets go of his arm. "I'm fine, thank you."

"You're gonna make me drink alone now?"

"I have to get up early, Harvey."

He responds with an exhale drenched in disappointment and she looks at the man sitting beside her.

They are in Philadelphia together because Donna had signed herself up for a two-day training course hoping it would give her some extra tools for, and insights in her relatively new position of Chief Operating Officer. There had been no one around to show her the ropes when she was promoted and gaining some knowledge from other professionals will hopefully strengthen her confidence. Coincidentally, Harvey had scheduled a series of meetings with Lincoln National to help the insurance provider with a new merger. Lincoln National was a new client, and it was important to demonstrate how much the firm was invested in their business, so he had offered to make the trip to Philadelphia himself.

As soon as they had realized they were traveling to the same destination on the same day, they each rescheduled and rebooked to align their plans as much as possible. They had arrived at the hotel an hour ago and decided on a nightcap before calling it a night.

Donna had prayed some time away from the office would do Harvey some good.

Ever since he came back from Boston last week, something had been off and she can't put her finger on it. She used to spend her days observing his every move; the details of his demeanor told her exactly what was going on. Tonight, however, the added benefits of being his secretary are something she has to do without. She _must_ rely on him for disclosure and struggles with the disadvantage.

Before the phone call, they were having drinks, talking, laughing. But a darkness has settled over him and she feels sorry for the heaviness resting on his shoulders.

The bar they are seated at is in the middle of the oversized hotel lobby. A dining area surrounds them and in the far corner is an object she's been eyeing from the minute they walked in. The baby grand piano looks inviting now that the resident piano player is packing up his things for the night and an idea inspires her. "Grab your drink."

Stunned at her sudden command, Harvey has no reason to question her and gets up, following her blindly as she struts over to the corner of the room, her flaring black pants fluttering in the air with every determined step she takes. She sits down and he decides that the best view for what's coming next is carefully leaning against the instrument. "I don't think I've ever heard you play before."

A soft smile appears on her lips and she meets his gaze. "You haven't." Which is exactly why this is the perfect moment to showcase her musical ability, as her fingers settle on the keys and a gentle melody erupts in the otherwise empty lobby.

Watching Donna play the piano with elegant hands impacts him in a way that is simultaneously soothing and exhilarating. After all their years together, there are apparently still things about her he doesn't know, and it tickles him. It also makes him wonder what else there is left to discover and how much he'd like to do just that.

After a few minutes of getting lost in the notes, the tune winds down and he claps his hands. "Donna Paulsen, you never cease to amaze me."

"I aim to please." An almost shy smile creeps up her mouth. "I used to play this for my grandma. We called her Mimi. Every holiday or birthday, any occasion where the family would all gather, my mom would ask me to play this song, because it reminded Mimi of my grandpa who died in the Korean war." As she speaks, her fingers move, accompanying her while she tells the tale. "This song was playing when he asked her to marry him and then they danced to it at their wedding. Apparently he was a romantic. Loved Valentine's Day. My mom was only two years old when he died in action."

Harvey listens in awe, the story new to him and he is sorry she never got to know her grandfather. At the same time, the notion strikes him that no child of his own will ever know his dad and he mourns the thought.

His eyes roam over the black-painted wood and he trails a finger over the surface. "You know, growing up, we used to have a piano in the house. My dad would sometimes write music on it." His words imbue with nostalgia, thinking of his childhood.

"Really? I didn't know Gordon could play the piano! Did he teach you anything?"

"He did." The words are out before he can stop himself, and he narrows his eyes at her when she moves to the edge of the bench without saying a word. He should feel self-conscious enough to not even consider it, but he doesn't and he's resists the urge to analyze why.

He takes a sip of courage and puts his drink on the top before taking a seat next to her. "When I was in sixth grade, I wanted to surprise my mom for Mother's Day. She was a big Elvis fan. Still is, I guess. So, my dad taught me how to play this one song. I haven't played it in ages and I probably still only know the intro." He mumbles nervously, unsure if he can even recall the notes, but as he places his fingers over the ivory, the familiar sequence comes rushing back and he starts playing the gentle, waltzing intro of 'Can't Help Falling in Love.'

Donna watches how with a beginner's hand Harvey moves over the keys and gets stuck during the first verse. But her mom was an Elvis fan, too, and she takes over, finishing the song for him.

A smile forms on his lips as Harvey immerses himself in the music. Ten minutes ago, he was feeling like shit, heartbroken over the news that his brother's marriage had ended. But then Donna stepped up and made him forget the world for a while. She always did that, didn't she? She had done it for years. Her influence on his life immeasurably vast. Pulling him back from the brink of misery or being the cause of his personal hell by leaving his desk.

She was everywhere, always.

He may have forgotten the notes, but the lyrics are not lost on him and as he listens to Donna play, he silently hums the words and for a while drowns in their meaning and his heart does that thing again.

_"Some things are meant to be."_

On their own accord and as they sometimes did, his thoughts wander to a what-if scenario. What if he put his arm around her? What if he kissed her? What if she kissed him back? What if they went upstairs together?

As quickly as they had come, he forces them away because his feelings are one-sided, but her leg is still touching his through a layer of enticing black silk, warming him in a manner that begs for more. Her familiar scent tickles his nose and he acts without thinking when she finishes playing. "That was beautiful." _And so are you_ , he thinks, swallowing the words before his lips can betray him. But he wants her, and their proximity isn't helping, because the hand that rests in his lap starts to drift over his leg, until his pinky brushes against her thigh and he waits for a response, for her to tell him to stop.

She doesn't.

Donna can't control the shiver that runs down her spine and gives him a hazy smile. "Thank you." His fingers continue touching the soft silk and there is no doubt the move is intentional. She gets lost in his eyes, unsure what to make of the situation.

Trying to read him, her eyes roam his features, but his face is a mask, although it fails to hide the desire shining in his dark, haunted eyes.

Damn it, he's close. Too close. And his hand is now covering her knee, his thumb mindlessly rubbing back and forth. God, he smells so good and in the dimmed light of the lobby, he is the most handsome man she's ever seen. But he's Harvey. And they don't do this, even though their gazes are locked as the air around them thickens and it seems like an invisible force is pulling them closer. His featherlight touch burns through her and her heart pounds as it catches in her throat. Involuntarily, her eyes drop to his lips and she wets her own in preparation. She can almost feel his breath on her mouth, and it would take no effort at all to close the distance now.

Still, blurring lines is different from crossing them and she panics. "It's getting late."

Harvey pulls back enough to look at her and slowly withdraws his hand, shocked to find he doesn't want to. As the sting of rejection hits, he is reminded they _shouldn't_. He knows they shouldn't. And obviously she doesn't want to. The memory of her kissing him months ago flashes before him and she'd made it perfectly clear she didn't feel anything then. He's an idiot to think things have changed and he feels like a goddamned fool _._

Annoyed with himself, he turns his head away. "You're right."

As he gets up from the seat, he watches her heave a sigh and waver, no doubt just as unsettled as he is. On instinct, he rounds to her side and extends an unsteady hand; a peace offering for toeing the line again when it wasn't appreciated.

Relief winds around his racing heart when her palm slips into his, and he lifts her up.

The forced smiles they exchange are inauspicious and rueful and all too familiar. They've been here before and the afflicted familiarity makes the ride up to the twelfth floor less uncomfortable than expected, but the silence is too loud between them with known feelings of hurt and regret floating around.

Their suites are across the hall from each other and they each retreat into their corners.

She meets his eyes briefly. "Good luck with Lincoln National tomorrow."

"Goodnight, Donna." He waits until she is inside, fighting the urge to follow her with all his might. Because, _goddammit_ , he wants to.

She smiles faintly, because she knows he's hurting. And it's something far deeper than Marcus getting divorced. It doesn't take a genius to figure out he feels abandoned from too many people leaving his life lately. But hooking up in search of comfort would have been a mistake. Especially with their history. And as much as she wants to be supportive, she must protect her own heart and she convinces herself she made the right choice in stopping them.

The door closes behind her and she slouches against the wood.

Why can't it be easy with them? They are never on the same page at the same time and after thirteen years, she doubts they ever will be.

There is no pretending, she is equally to blame for their complicated relationship. Be it dictating stupid rules or crossing lines at inopportune times. The kiss in her office, the one she surprised them both with, comes rushing back in full color and she winces remembering the fallout and the lie she told him. _I didn't feel anything._

It wasn't supposed to happen like that. She never meant to end his relationship, but he chose her over his girlfriend and even though it's been months, she still feels the urge to prove herself worthy of his friendship.

Right after her failed effort to resign, she made a clear decision to cut those threads tethering her heart to his. She had come so close to losing him, there was no way she would ever risk their friendship again. Not unless she was a thousand percent sure they wanted the same thing for the right reasons. And as far as she can tell, they are nowhere near that point. Not tonight, anyway.

At a futile attempt to clear her mind, she prepares to take a shower before burying herself in a book she brought, hoping it will drown out the frustration and ache coursing through her.

·

Across the hall, Harvey drapes his jacket over the couch and toes off his shoes as the adrenaline from minutes before slowly dissipates. If he had any doubts about her feelings before, what just happened tells him all he needs to know and his heart drops, heavy with sorrow.

He's too late.

He let her slip away before he ever got a chance to tell her he was ready to be with her and he fights the lump forming in his throat.

Too many people have left his life recently. People he thought would be there forever are now gone. He can't lose her, too. If the only way to have her in his life is as a friend, co-worker, whatever, then so be it. Still, the nagging desire to tell her how she means the world to him remains, haunting his desolate dreams when his body finally succumbs to exhaustion.

Maybe tomorrow.

·❤·

Looking at the clock on the wall, Donna is reminded how this day drags by. The training is boring and doesn't teach her much. If anything, she is tutoring other people. Men, mostly, because there are only four women out of twenty-five trainees and two of them have their noses so far up in the air, she wonders if they are getting enough oxygen at that altitude.

The third is a blonde, from around her age who reminds her of Samantha and they end up spending most of the day together.

At lunch, Wheeler II, whose real name is Susan, shows her pictures of her husband and two gorgeous kids and Donna leans on her best acting abilities to conceal her true reaction when confronted by them and the inevitable questions that follow. "Do you have any kids?" No. "Are you married?" No. "Seeing anyone." No goddammit. _No!_ The pitiful looks and comments meant to boost her misfortunate existence are not original nor helpful and she wishes this day would end.

She likes Susan. Really. However, her questions are a reminder of everything she secretly longs for but misses in her life. Especially at a time when she wonders if she'll ever have any of it at all. For all her accomplishments, finding Mr. Right has been the toughest one so far.

In a comforting effort of her subconscious, she thinks of Harvey. Immediately, the memory of what happened last night flashes before her for the umpteenth time today and she fights how it makes her feel. _Beguiled and bewildered._ It was only a moment and most likely didn't mean anything. Just one more to add to the list of 'bad ideas'. Best to focus on their working relationship and not overcomplicate things. Again.

She hasn't heard from him and she wishes he'd check in. He always did whenever he was meeting a client remotely and she hopes everything is okay.

·

After lunch, Harvey finds himself alone. All morning long, he was surrounded by the board of directors of Lincoln National, all weighing in on the best course of action regarding the merger. He prides himself on his ability to focus on the job at hand and not let personal issues get in the way of what needs to be done. But now that he is by himself, he can't help his wandering mind taking him to places he denied himself for so long. Too long.

Donna.

The minute he allows his thoughts to roam free, they blanket him in seas of auburn and hazel; of freckled porcelain skin and how close he came to kissing her last night. He is tired of running. Tired of hiding from his feelings and he takes his phone ready to call her.

He hesitates. What if she's busy? He doesn't know her schedule and he doesn't want to disturb her, knowing how important this training is to her. So, he texts her instead.

·

Sometime in the early afternoon, her purse vibrates against her leg under the table and she has half a mind to grab it, but her attention is required and she resists, even though the damn thing is distracting with a promise of lessening her discomfort.

When she finally does have a moment to check her phone, her pulse unwillingly skips a beat at seeing Harvey's name.

The text is simple, but her heart stops beating altogether when she reads the words.

_Can we talk tonight?_

Talk. Talk? Why? What about? They never _talked._ They either fought or pretended nothing happened. The few times she wanted to talk, he was MIA or simply deflected. She is not ready yet to hear him say once again that he doesn't want more. And she isn't sure she can handle him wanting the opposite.

But there's only one way to find out.

With a hammering heart, she texts him she'll be back around seven, so drinks at eight should work fine.

The remainder of the afternoon crawls by, although the prospect of a conversation with Harvey, a real one this time, pushes her through it.

A few hours later, her phone is on the table when she sees the screen light up and his name is printed above another message.

_Change of plans. Lincoln wants to have dinner and they insisted I invite you. I'll text you the details when I have them._

She grumbles. Dinner with a client means no drinks with Harvey and a tightness weaves its way around her nerves. Their plans getting canceled gives him ample time to change his mind about wanting to talk. Even worse, she'll have to force herself in her role of COO for a dinner with people she doesn't even know and it is the least appealing way to spend her evening.

A mournful sigh escapes her lips as she tries to focus on the man up front explaining something about diversity in the boardroom. _Dammit!_

·

Harvey checks his watch again. Donna was supposed to be here fifteen minutes ago. She's never late and he is starting to get worried. Going through his messages, he double checks he gave her the right location and finds that he did. She needs to get here quick, because the sooner she gets here, the sooner this dinner will be over and they can finally have those drinks. Together. Alone.

Because he is ready. Terrified. But ready. His mind is made up and it's time she knew, too, no matter the consequences.

His gaze lands on the poster stuck on the wall he's facing, inviting people to make their Valentine's Day reservations. He's always loathed the non-holiday and he is pretty sure Donna doesn't care for it either, but he can't help but entertain the idea of surprising her with a bouquet of roses this year. Nothing too romantic and something he can still shove under the category 'friendly gestures'. Worst case scenario, he'll just send them anonymously. _Shit._ He laughs at his own idiocy. Is he already that far gone?

When Donna finally walks into Vetri Cucina, the fancy Italian restaurant Harvey told her the dinner was at, she quickly scans the place. She is late and she knows it, but she had to change first and the drive took longer than expected. She curses the fact she'll make an entrance when the last thing she wants is to draw attention to herself.

She feels restless, from too little sleep and too many thoughts crowding her mind.

Her eyes search for Harvey's and when they find his, he gets up, prompting the company he is with to all turn their heads and three more pair of eyes are now boring into her. She takes a deep breath and summons the actress in herself, cloaking her true mood for the time being by smiling broadly as she walks into unknown territory.

As she approaches the table, a man and woman are finishing up their discussion, sitting intimately together. It even looks like they are holding hands, acting more like lovers than co-workers. Another man, standing next to Harvey, has his eyes glued to her and she studies his handsome features and well-coiffed, full head of black hair. He's tall, taller than Harvey and his bright blue eyes scrutinize her from head to toe. They are mesmerizing and as they travel over her, she can almost feel the heat burning a path over her body. Put at ease by his kind posture and the warming smile he sports, she walks up with her hand reaching out to place into Mr. Handsome's.

"When Harvey told me the COO of Zane Specter Litt was in town, I just knew we had to extend our dinner invitation. And boy, am I glad we did." The gentle man lifts their hands to his mouth and presses a soft kiss on the back of hers. "Michael Rogers."

Normally, Donna would be put off by men trying to charm her like this, but there is something disarming about Michael and the fact he doesn't add his job title. She knows he is the company's CEO, but right now, he's happy to just be a guy in a restaurant, enamored by her. He scores some points with that. He also wears his heart on his sleeve, and if nothing else, she has always appreciated that in a man.

Therefore, she isn't lying when she replies, "Donna Paulsen. It's nice to meet you, Mr. Rogers."

"Trust me, Ms. Paulsen. The pleasure is all mine."

Donna notices how his eyes light up when he smiles at her and all reservations about this obligated dinner evaporate. She almost forgets Harvey is there, watching her every move, but she ignores him. If she caught him looking jealous at all, she might slip back into old habits of putting his needs first and that would negate the potential tonight promises. If Rogers turns out to have substance to his glorious exterior, it will be tough for Harvey, but she won't deny herself the fun to spare his feelings.

"Donna, meet Chris Matheson, the CFO of Lincoln National and Lisa Gilmore, Executive Vice President and General Counsel," Michael says. "In case you were wondering, they aren't having an affair on company time. They have been married for years. I might have brought my wife, too, but I'm not married." A devilish grin spreads over his lips as his stare intensifies.

Wow. Donna chuckles. This man is unbelievable, but she can't help but feel relieved at the information, because she is positively enthralled by his charm. So, tactfully, she makes sure he takes notice of her unadorned left hand.

Harvey watches the mating ritual enfold before his eyes and his chest constricts when Donna doesn't try to hide how smitten she is with Rogers. It's not the first time a client tries to hit on her, but it is the first time she doesn't seem to object and she may as well have slapped in the face. He gulps down his drink and rereads the menu, the whole situation suddenly too much to bear.

"So, tell me," Michael starts, fully focused on Donna, "how long have you two been working together?"

Stealing a glance at Harvey, who has shrunken back in his seat, she replies, "Fourteen, fifteen years. It's been a while. I used to be his secretary before I got promoted."

"Wow, you must have been one hell of a secretary, Ms. Paulsen."

"I was," she beams. "I'm one hell of a COO, too." Now she's just bragging, but she likes saying out loud that she _is_ the firm's COO.

"And a good friend." Harvey's voice cut through the conversation, empty glass raised, face tight. Donna looks at him. His eyes are withdrawn and he looks wounded. Hints of guilt trickle down her system, despite the fact she hadn't exactly planned on having fun tonight. But now that she is, she sure as hell won't let Harvey's mood ruin it for her, not after the awful day she's had. After all, it's not like he has a right to be jealous.

"You guys are friends, too?" Michael wonders. "You sure are one lucky son of a bitch, Harvey!"

Harvey scoffs. Yeah, lucky him.

"So, tell me Donna, how do you like being COO?"

As Michael and Donna engage in conversation, Harvey wishes he had never invited her. She wasn't supposed to be meeting the love of her life here. _They_ were supposed to be discussing _them_.

Here he is, finally facing his feelings for her and instead she is flirting with the CEO of a Forbes 500 company, hitting it off like it is nobody's business, all while he sits there like a fucking third wheel.

There's no doubt Donna is making an effort to involve him in the conversation, but as a guy, Harvey knows what's on Michael's mind and it bugs him more than he's willing to admit.

Luckily, the food is good, which makes up for the company and Harvey has to force himself not to sulk.

He succeeds, mostly.

After dinner, Michael excuses himself and Chris and Lisa jump on the chance to talk to Donna. Harvey stifles a yawn. The hours of sleep he lost last night are finally catching up with him and he is ready to call it a night. Unfortunately, he has a hard time finding the right moment to leave. And more importantly, he wants Donna to come with him for an ever-growing list of reasons.

A few minutes pass and he spots Michael on his way back to their table and says to Donna, "I'm heading back. You wanna share a cab?"

Before she has a chance to respond, Michael interjects, because apparently he has superhuman hearing and caught Harvey trying to bail. "My car's just outside. I can take her back to the hotel." He turns to Donna. "If that's okay with you, of course."

Donna stares into his intriguing, blue eyes and can't ignore that he has aroused her interest. Aside from the fact he's ridiculously attractive and also happens to love the theater, he is a successful businessman, with a large family he talked about vividly. Besides, she is a sucker for flattery and it's not like this can go anywhere. The distance alone would be reason enough to stop anything before it begins, yet it feels so damn good to be wanted by someone who isn't afraid to show it.

So, she does what she's rarely done before. Choose herself. "I'd like that, Michael." Looking at Harvey, she notes he's no longer hiding his disappointment and recognizes a sincere concern mixed in there as well. "I'll be fine, Harvey."

"Have it your way," he grunts, before telling the Lincoln threesome goodnight and walking out. Once the cold night air hits his skin, he tightens his scarf and pulls his collar to the wind as lead rests in his chest.

Given the chance, he might make her fall for him, but if there's a third party involved, all bets are off. The desire to run back in there and lay all his cards on the table spreads like a wildfire, but he hails a cab instead.

Hours later, he awakes from a light slumber and tries to focus. Voices. Laughter. In the hallway. He recognizes Donna's chuckle and the low rumble can only be Michael's. He glances at the alarm clock sitting on his bedside table. It's a little past two and he struggles to make out what they are saying. A moment later he hears a door closing and with it the voices die down. Without warning, his imagination goes into overdrive and he curses into the darkness.

·❤·

The next day, Harvey and Michael are having a celebratory lunch. The merger was signed an hour ago and they are at a rooftop restaurant overlooking the city. So far, Rogers hasn't brought up last night, but Harvey knows it's inevitable, especially with the business part now out of the way.

He thought of texting Donna this morning but decided against it. What would he say, anyway? 'How was your date?' No fucking way. But he wishes he knew how to reach out to her in moments like this. How could she be so close one minute and a million miles away the next?

"So, Harvey. Tell me about Donna." Michael sips his champagne, demanding his attention. "She isn't seeing anyone, is she? I mean, she told me she isn't, but you never know."

Harvey's eyes narrow. How dare he accuse Donna of playing him! "No. She's not seeing anyone." It pains him to say it, because she should be seeing him. Would be, too, if his timing had been a little better. If this guy tells him they slept together last night, he isn't sure how he'll react and he steels himself with jaws clenched.

Michael eyes Harvey skeptically. Something is off, judging by Harvey's defensive attitude and he chances to inquire. "You two ever…" he trails off, suddenly aware he just overstepped big time.

Astonished at the audacity, Harvey glares at him, reminding himself this is still a client. Nonetheless, he spits his answer out through gritted teeth. "That is none of your business."

"I'm sorry. I just thought I detected something there."

"Well, you didn't." He wipes his mouth with his napkin. This was the last place he ever thought he'd be discussing his complicated relationship with Donna and the impulse to flee is overwhelming. He needs a drink. Anything to ease the uncomfortable sensation crawling under his skin.

A loaded silence stretches between them before Michael finally speaks.

"Just FYI, nothing happened last night. Trust me, I tried. But she said she didn't sleep with men she'd just met."

The words are like music to his ears and Harvey releases a breath he didn't know he had been holding. That's the Donna he knows and he hates himself for doubting her morals.

Michael can tell the revelation changes Harvey's temperament, because the tightness in his shoulders dissolves. Evidently, he's not the only one infatuated by the gorgeous redhead and male etiquette propels him to ask, "You want to be with her? Tell me now and I'll back off."

Harvey meets Michael's gaze, searching for any evidence the CEO is lying to him, but comes up empty. _Fuck._ Is he really going to reveal his feelings to a stranger before he gets a chance to tell Donna? If he doesn't and this guy asks her out, he might lose his chance forever. If anything, she deserves someone like Rogers and Harvey realizes he can't be selfish now when so far, Donna has only confirmed his feelings for her are unrequited.

Torn in two, he tries to act cool. "No, I don't."

Michael snorts and shakes his head. "I'm sorry for saying this, Harvey, but you're an idiot."

"Excuse me?" Outrage taints the words rolling off his tongue in defense. He doesn't need a total stranger telling him how he feels. Not when he is trying hard to be the better man.

"Don't insult my intelligence, Harvey. I saw how you looked at her," Michael continues. "Listen, I get it. It's complicated. But if you won't tell her how you feel, I _will_ ask her out. Because that is one heck of a woman and if I even have the slightest chance with her, I will move heaven and earth to win her over."

Well, if it wasn't Prince Charming himself telling him to get moving.

"Fuck." The profanity comes out louder than intended, but he can't control his frustration any longer. "So, what if I do?" It's rhetorical and somewhat desperate, whispering more to himself than anyone else. And when Michael speaks, he fights the embarrassment prowling around his attitude.

"Then you tell her. It's as simple as that. And if your friendship is as strong as she says, it will survive if she doesn't reciprocate. Just don't wait too long okay. Because someone will eventually come along and sweep her off her feet."

 _Goddammit_. He knows that. He can still name the bastards that have tried over the years, in chronological order.

It's time he stepped up to the plate and took a swing himself.

·

During the afternoon break, Donna checks her phone again. Day two of the training is better than the previous one, even though she is now suffering from a lack of sleep and can't contain a yawn escaping her.

After Harvey left last night, she stayed at the restaurant with Michael, talking, laughing, ordering another dessert. Chris and Lisa took off a little while later and she and Michael had spent the rest of the evening enjoying each other's company. The more they talked, the more she realized Michael Rogers ticked all the boxes and as the hours passed, the whole distance thing was becoming less of an issue. And when he had insisted on walking her up to her room, it had taken every ounce of strength she'd had to _not_ invite him in. But if this had as much potential as she predicted, sleeping with him straight away wouldn't have seem right.

So, instead, she only kissed him goodnight. One of those kisses she still felt as she brushed her teeth and when she laid her head down on her pillow. The type of kiss that could almost make her forget about Harvey altogether. Almost. But not quite. Because the minute she closed her eyes, the vision of his aggrieved face danced before her. She hadn't intentionally hurt him, but she also hadn't considered his feelings at all. And wasn't he the one who had initiated their moment at the piano? What if his feelings towards her had changed and he was willing to try? Her romantic life had bothered him before, but she'd never seen him this upset. Something was different. But what?

Looking at her screen, she stares at the notifications. Both Michael and Harvey texted her and she checks Michael's first, excited to read what he has to say.

_Hello, gorgeous! I know I said we could meet tonight, but something has come up. I'll call you tomorrow. X_

Yeah, right. She had been around enough to know that was never going to happen and she huffs. Had she read him wrong? He seemed to be into her last night. Maybe he wasn't as single as he'd said he was. Or maybe… She stops her train of thought. The reason for his cancellation doesn't matter. All she should take away from his message is that he is too busy to see her. Disappointed and a little stunned, she doesn't even reply, but there's a pain in her heart from yet another prospect slipping through her fingers.

Against her better judgment, she taps Harvey's message, quite surprised he texted her at all.

_You busy tonight?_

She shakes her head. Way to be inconspicuous, Harvey, she thinks.

_Not anymore. Why?_

No reason to hide the truth. He'll put two and two together that the reason for her plans was Michael, who bailed on her with some lame excuse.

_Drinks?_

She exhales a heavy breath. The rejection from Michael hurts her more than she's willing to admit. Right now she doesn't want to see anybody, especially those residing at the edge of her solitary existence, the ones that could make that solitary existence not so solitary but for whatever reason won't. Moreover, the feeling that she owes Harvey an apology niggles at her and she despises it. Being social is the last thing on her list and she's already looking forward to taking a long, hot bath and getting lost in a book, hidden away from everything and everyone.

_Training will end late. Raincheck?_

As she looks at her phone, she sees Harvey is typing, but no message ever comes and she puts the device back in her purse, forcing her focus on the instructor.

·

Facing the hotel entrance, Harvey tells himself it's the only empty spot at the bar and takes a seat, draping his suit jacket over the stool next to his. The bartender pours him his favorite Scotch without having to ask and he doesn't know if he should be grateful the guy is good at his job or horrified that he apparently looks like he needs it. Because he does.

After lunch, Harvey's business in Philadelphia was finished and he had some time to explore the city. It was mid-February and the air was cold, so he hadn't spent too much time outside, but the winter sun came out at the end of the afternoon and he had gone for a walk in Fairmount Park. The conversation with Michael replayed itself over and over and he had to give it to the male. Not a lot of men would have taken a step back in their pursuit of female affection just so another guy could have a shot. Nevertheless, he'd been given a fair warning in case his cowardly ass chickened out again and he promised himself he wouldn't.

Still, Donna told him she didn't want to see him tonight and he isn't sure if he'll ever have the courage again. So, he plants himself at the bar and waits for her to return. In the background, the hotel's pianist plays his Valentine's Day repertoire.

Her ethereal beauty proceeds her when she strides through the hotel a little after nine, drawing Harvey's attention away from his half-empty glass. She doesn't look up and heads straight for the elevators without noticing him. A fire ignites and he calls out to the bartender to charge the drink to his room. He grabs his jacket and sprints in her direction. The elevator doors are closing when he thrusts his arm between them, forcing them to open at the last minute.

Surprise and confusion color her features and he smiles faintly at the other two people in there with them who look startled.

Standing next to Donna, he turns his body towards her. "I'm sorry about last night. I didn't mean to–," he starts.

"Didn't mean what?" She cuts him off. "How you left with that pained look on your face?"

The elevator dings and someone gets off. It breaks their momentum and she stares at her feet, feeling claustrophobic for a moment, cornered, with him leering over her. The elevator carriage is rather small and he's standing close. Close enough for his scent to engulf her and it throws her off track.

He doesn't answer, so she answers for him. "It's fine, Harvey." It's not, but she won't get into it now. "I'm tired."

His courage wavers and he changes the subject. "What happened with Michael?"

The elevator stops again, losing another passenger and leaving them by themselves.

"You know what? I really liked him and I thought the feeling was mutual, but he doesn't want to see me, so there's nothing to tell." She speaks in a factual manner and it's the first time he recognizes her coping mechanism; the way she downplays the situation to keep herself from hurting too much. He briefly wonders if the pain he witnesses is his fault because he'd told Rogers not to pursue her. It most likely is. _Shit._

"I'm sorry."

She is too.

At least they are consistent in other ways, like how they are managing to avoid addressing the almost-kiss they shared two nights ago.

They pass the final floors in silence and when the elevator dings this time, they start the short walk to their suites.

Donna's emotional defenses are up and Harvey fails to think of a way to break through them, afraid of saying the wrong thing and pushing her even further away. She's clearly agitated and he falters.

Coming to a halt in front of her room, he whispers softly, "Goodnight, Donna."

Their eyes meet.

She scans his face, looking for any trace there might be hope, one minuscule sign that he might be ready to open up to her, to break old habits. But the moment stretches and not the faintest hint anything has changed between them surfaces. Her heart sinks and she drops her gaze.

The resignation in her features hits him like a freight train. He never meant for things to happen this way. There isn't a lot he's sure of in life, but after the past few days, he knows that no matter what, he needs Donna by his side. And not just as a friend anymore. But the divide between them is too big to breach, littered with almosts and never-quites. More than a decade of missed chances and too many fears of possible what-ifs keep him suspended in time.

"Goodnight, Harvey." It isn't just a cordial greeting. It's a goodbye to what they could have been; the final moment before the book closes on them forever, because with every fiber of her being Donna knows she can't keep doing this with him. Not after thirteen years of push and pull. _Not anymore_. It's over. She's done.

Fighting the tears that are burning behind her eyes, she turns without looking at him.

Watching her walk away hurts too much and he turns his back to her. But the farther he goes, the more intense the pain gets, and he realizes he's walking in the wrong direction. He freezes on the spot and spins around, just when she's about to put the card in the slot.

_"Like a river flows, surely to the sea."_

He can't let her go.

Her name rolls off his tongue easily, like it's the only valid thing left to say. "Donna, wait."

In slow motion, he watches her retract the card and push open the door. Their gazes lock, and for the briefest of moments, he can tell she's marred, because she turns her head away hastily, thrusting at the heavy door to put the final barrier between them.

With three strides, he covers the distance and is just in time to keep the door open as it tries to lock him out. "Donna, please."

How wonderful life would be if she could simply say 'no' to him; to tell him to leave her alone. Unfortunately for her, the way he pleads tugs at her heartstrings, and she is willing to give him one last chance. More likely _another_ chance, one of a thousand more. She ignores her conscious mind laughing at her. "What do you want, Harvey?"

With her foot against the door, she folds her arms over her chest in a protective effort. He can't hurt her, she tells herself. She won't allow it. Not again. It's a familiar mantra that has kept her upright through the years, but even as she recites it now, she feels the weight of the words lacking their usual impact.

The venom in her tone makes him stumble backwards, as she holds the door open, moving her body in the doorjamb. _You_ , he thinks, but fails to say. He's fought bigger and tougher battles in his life, in the ring and in court and none of them intimidated him. But he is terrified right now. He knows all the signs. The sweaty palms, the accelerated heartbeat, the shortness of breath. It's a panic attack in the making if he doesn't act fast. Because there's far more at stake than losing a friendly sparring match or an unhappy client and still all he can do is stare at her, paralyzed.

To watch him waver is the last straw. "I can't do this anymore, Harvey."

She is ready to close the door on him, on them and he can't allow it, no matter how mad she might be at him. "I want _this_ ," he blurts out. It's vague and non-committal, but at least it's something until he finds the right words to convey what he needs to.

"And what is 'this' exactly?" She leans to the side, daring him to explain.

Donna isn't giving him an easy out and he knows he owes her more. He rubs a hand over his face, trying to shake the uneasiness off, preparing himself for the plunge he's about to take. "I can't stop thinking about…" His eyes meet hers and he prays she would just use her Donnaness on him and tell him what he's feeling. Instead, she stares at him, arms still crossed in defense and he relents. "… you. The piano. That night." He stumbles over the words, a tingling of nerves itching below his skin. He isn't good at expressing his emotions and feeling like a fool unnerves him.

He drops his gaze, trying to hide the vulnerability on display and Donna feels something rising from the depths of her being, causing her heart to race. For the first time in forever she allows herself to think of the hypothetical situation where Harvey might want more. Perhaps the notion isn't so hypothetical anymore. What if he really means it? What if he's ready? She stands up straighter and lets her arms fall to the side in a harmonious gesture. "What are you saying?"

Her voice is soft, her eyes even softer, shining with a glimmer of expectation and he feels his feet drive him forward.

Of their own volition, his hands reach to find hers and he covers them gently, rubbing his thumb over the back as her own grip tightens.

The move emboldens him. His breath hitches in his throat and his heart beats so loud, he's afraid she might hear it thump. "I'm saying that I want you."

Harvey is dizzy, unsure about what to do next, panic still raging awfully close beneath the surface, but at least the truth is out and it gives him a moment to breathe.

Staring up at him, she can feel the heat coming off his body, the warmth of his hands as they hold hers, like the sun burning her skin on a hot summer's day. Too much and it'll burn you alive and she thinks she's overexposed as it is, because dark eyes pierce her, growing darker by the second and she watches him inch forward while she remains rooted to the spot.

Her eyes are so wide, he is afraid he might drown in them. They also tell him she is just as scared as he is, and the notion quietly comforts him. Standing this close only increases his strangled desire and their bodies are like magnets, drawing closer until his lips are hovering above hers. He closes his eyes in anticipation, readying himself to remember every detail about this moment, because everything will be different from now on.

With the hint of a smile tugging at the edges of his mouth, he eliminates the small distance between them.

As their lips meet, he moves his hands to her waist, mindlessly making sure she can't run, although something tells him she isn't going anywhere, because her arms reach around his neck and pull him even closer, inviting him into her mouth further and he gratefully accepts.

Holding her delicate frame to his hard body reminds him of the fragility of their relationship and before he gets carried away, he disengages their lips and rests his forehead against hers with a tender smile on his face.

She feels his breath on her skin as his taste lingers on her lips. "Are you sure?" Donna hates not being in control, being this exposed, knowing he now holds her heart in his hands. So, she _has_ to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he is all in.

He doesn't delay his answer, his stare unwavering as their eyes meet. "I am." To support his declaration, he strengthens his hold on her waist. "It's always been you, Donna. I just wish it hadn't taken me so long to finally see it."

Heat flushes her cheeks as lightheadedness takes over and she is thankful for his arms keeping her on her feet. This is it. The unexpected ending to a seemingly infinite chapter. "Would you like to come in?"

"Just so you know, if I come in, I might not leave." He dips down and leaves a soft, but determined kiss on her swollen lips, adding weight to his statement.

Donna rolls her eyes at his seriousness, glad she isn't the only one feeling the heaviness of what hangs in the balance, but as long as they are on the same page, maybe all that's at stake is the pain of being separated and that's a sacrifice she's gladly willing to make.

So, she smiles gingerly, a teasing tone to her voice, when she says, "That's kind of the point."

Harvey's own smile broadens as all panic seeps out of him, making room for a new sensation he isn't familiar with. He guesses that people would label this happiness and he is okay with that description. Because for the first time in his life, he is.

·❤·

**Author's Note:**

> _A/N: As a life-long Elvis fan, I have always wanted to use this song for them and was glad to have the opportunity. Hope you enjoyed it! Would love to hear your thoughts! Happy Valentine's Day!_


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